Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Aug. 31st: Blog-A-Day Shall Survive!

It's August 31st where I am, and, well, this was supposed to be the last entry of Blog-A-Day. There would've been confetti being dropped from the ceiling, a grand tally of my favorite posts from the month, and a special performance from Tony Orlando.

But...Hurricane Irene changed all that by knocking out my power and Internet over the weekend. But with that comes good news! Blog-A-Day shall continue into September!

I'll tell you the truth, gang, writing has really helped me out this month. It's one of the few things that's keeping me sane; I've mentioned before that it's one of the main reasons why I started this damn blog in the first place. A constant schedule, a new idea each day. I'll admit, it got my brain juices flowing again, and I really loved that.

So you could imagine how getting knocked out of that rhythm a few days before the finish line got me so bummed out. But fear not dear readers, I will trudge on! Expect a new entry tomorrow!

...Oh, all right. Since the guy needs the money, here's a performance by Tony Orlando:

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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Aug. 30th: A Look at Storm Damage

When I was out and about the other day, wondering when my internet was gonna come back on (it came back at noon today...thank God), I hopped in my car to check out the damage that Hurricane Irene had wrought upon us.

Here's a close call.
This tree had a little too much last night...
Sucks to be this house.
See the branches on those power lines? Ouch.

That last picture looked like the culprit behind my lost power AND my lost internet. I hope it becomes mulch. Mulch that feeds hippies at their picnics. I know that they have picnics, and that mulch will help make the next one more enjoyable because all they do is eat mulch. You know what? I gotta stop watching Fox News.

By the way, these were just the ones I managed to get pictures for. Around my neighborhood and elsewhere, there were downed trees and power lines wherever I went. As in: some were split in half, several trees were big enough to block roads, and generally being a pain in the ass.

At least that's all over and done with. With the internet back, I can safely say that there will be no more homicides. I mean, er, no more homicides today! Umm...erm...YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!

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Monday, August 29, 2011

Aug. 29th: The Hurricane...

Hey folks, you know what I said about that storm the other night? Well, I somehow angered it and it took out my Internet for an indeterminate amount of time.

So as for new posts? Until I get Internet back, don't really expect much outta me. Sorry folks, I'm sad, too.

On the bright side, this is the very first entry I posted while mobile!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Saturday, August 27, 2011


Well, kids, the subject line is true. Since Beaming For Bunnies Home Base is stationed on Long Island, I'm currently in the direct path of Hurricane Irene.

I'm somewhere in the...white area.

I'm not worrying, though. My mom's freaked out that we'll lose power and there will be mass panic and yadda yadda yadda. I'm sure I'll be fine, and you'll see another entry for tomorrow. If anything bad won't.

If any of you are in my position, I hope you all stay safe, stay dry, and stay sane. The masses have been flocking to the food stores these past few days because of the coming apocalypse that won't happen, and if you're able to find bread and water (and not cat food labeled as such), then hooray for you.

New York City has pretty much shut down, and that NEVER happens. Better safe than sorry, I guess. The mayor's trying to cover his ass so another blizzard debacle doesn't happen. Nevertheless, the city's trash collectors have already taken the week off. So, again, nothing to worry about.

Until tomorrow, here's a relevant video:

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Aug. 26th: Dennis vs Vinylmation Part 3

Part 1
Part 2

Merv: "Man, I hope that Optimus guy is okay. I don't want my sixteen dollars to go to waste on that Vinylmation."

Dennis: "He's the leader of the Autobots, of course he'll be okay! At the very least, he'll die anticlimactically and be revived in a couple of days."


Optimus: "Here's your MacGuffin Cube boys, safe and sound! With only 5 human casualties from the crossfire! A personal best for me!"

Merv: "That's good and all, but come on! I wanna see if I'm mildly rich!"


Dennis: "Well, that took forever."

Merv: "And, look! There's foil all ova the thing! Disney does NOT want people to cheat at this, don't they?"

Optimus: "Allow me to assist you with opening this demon foil, friends!"


Dennis: "Well, it isn't Abe Lincoln. I was hoping it'd be the Troll guy."

Merv: "Well, that's it. Just toss it in the trash like the rest of the eBay crap I bought."

Optimus: "Merv, no! This inanimate object is a sentient being, and its right to exist must be honored."

Merv: "Ugh, fine. Hey, Vinylmation thing. You able to talk?"

Vinylmation: "I believe so. All I know is that, with these stripes for eyes, I'm pretty sure I'm some sort of abomination."

Dennis: "Nonsense! look like one of those clapboards they use in the movies!"

Vinylmation: "Do the movies still use clapboards?"

Optimus: "I like that idea. Your name from this point forward shall be...Clapboard!"

Clapboard: "Sigh."


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Thursday, August 25, 2011

Aug. 25th: Dennis vs Vinylmation Part 2

Part 1

Optimus: "So you see, this may spell doom to us all."

Dennis: "Well, you've been saying that for the past five hours. WHAT exactly will spell doom for us all?"

Optimus: "Well, Mudflap, that cube you had could contain the Secrets of The Universe. For all we know, our enemy, the Decepticons, must have stolen it to use it as a power source for Megatron's massage chair. Or maybe something even worse: He'll pawn its contents for a power source for a machine strong enough to massage the entire world!"

Merv: "Um, actually, it was just a Vinylmation box. Ya know, little statue things made by Disney?

Dennis: "He'll get around fifty dollars if he gets Abe Lincoln."

Optimus: "Fifty bucks? Then this is worse than I feared. Overpriced figurines of Mickey Mouse are what makes sentient beings such as yourselves worth protecting."

Optimus: "Merv, Cosmos, you two guard the base, I need to roll out right this second!"

Optimus: "Optimus Prime, TRANSFORM!"

Optimus: "So help me Primus, if they do anything evil with that cube, I'll shoot some double-barreled JUSTICE right up Megatron's ass! ROLL OUT!"

Merv: "...What base?"


Starscream: "Ahh, yes, this cube MUST hold the secrets of the universe!"

Starscream: "I'll use it to massage Megatron so hard, he'll HAVE to relinquish the Decepticon leadership to me!"

Megatron: "You know I'm standing right here, you blathering idiot."

Megatron: "We're only six inches apart, you know."

Starscream: "Oh, umm...forgive me, Lord Megatron. BEHOLD!"

Megatron: "What kind of baldercrap did you bring me this time, Starscream? I hope it's not another pineapple. BECAUSE I'VE JUST ABOUT HAD IT WITH FRUIT!!"

Starscream: "No, no, this one's far better, yes. This cube I stole from some unsuspecting Earth creatures contains a treasure that'll help us destroy the Autobots for sure!"

Starscream: "It's a Vinylmation figurine from Disney! It's a rare treasure from thousands of miles away, obtained from the mythical eBay. If this cube holds the body of Abe Lincoln, we'll be fifty Earth Dollars richer! It'll surely be enough to buy a better Earthquake Machine!"

Megatron: "YOU FOOL. After that last machine did nothing but massage the planet, I've decided to go back to the drawing board!

Megatron: "Besides, this cube probably contains the Troll guy, and we both know that he's FUCKING WORTHLESS!"

Megatron: "Gah, you and your incompetencies. I wish an Autobot showed up right now to take this useless macguffin out of my sight before I decide to blast it and yourself to bits!"


Starscream: "Optimus Prime! He -- He must have followed me!"

Megatron: "Oh. No. Optimus Prime. I hope he doesn't take this precious cube without consequences and shoot Starscream in the chest."

Optimus: "That's right, Megatron. You'll pay for stealing this cube of wonders!"

Starscream: "You -- you can't! This is MY riches! Er, I mean, OUR riches! Our fantastic Abe Lincoln cube belongs to the Decepticon cause!"

Megatron: "Shut. Up. Starscream."

Optimus: "Now, I'll just be taking this before I have to use my guns of JUSTICE this time. You don't want JUSTICE anywhere near your eyes when they fire off. Now...will you be good Decepticons and hand it over for the sake of the entire Earth race?"

Megatron: "Gah. fine. You win this time, Prime. Take it. I have been foiled again."

Optimus: "You chose wisely, Megatron. ROLL OUT!"

Megatron: "...Well, that was easy. Now for your daily punishment for being an idiot, Starscream."


Starscream: "(sighs)"


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