Sunday, February 28, 2010

Two Years!

Woo! Beaming For Bunnies turns Two years old today!



It's been a hell of a year! I've had a blast writing what little entries got out of the gate this year! Here's a link to the entry for the first Birthday. It turns out that the official birthday of the blog was YESTERDAY. Whoops. Well, that's leprosy for you.

...Yeah, about Simpsons Month? I got a bit careless and lazy. It doesn't mean that Simpsons Month has to stop tonight, no sir! It's going to go on for as long as possible, until I get those entries up! Simpsons Trimester? Simpsons Year? Simpsons DECADE?! I don't really care, I just love it that much.

I promise this year will be filled with awesomeness! You just gotta give me time and chutzpah to actually sit down and write these things.

Until then, enjoy some Two-based imagery!







Tuesday, February 16, 2010

13 Underrated Simpsons Episodes

It's been roughly a week and a half since I posted the first entry for Simpsons Month, so It's about damn time I post another. As you're all probably aware of, I've seen every episode of the show (453 as of this writing!) and in a show that runs for 21 seasons, there's bound to be episodes that are excellent, some are bad, and some are just plain "meh."

But this entry is not about any of those. No, these episodes in question are GOOD, but simply lie between that plane of "meh" and "excellent." These episodes rarely, if ever, show up on people's "Best ___ Ever" lists, and it's usually for a multitude of reasons.

Perhaps they were good episodes, but they were lost among the soup of other, more awesome episodes that aired around it? Maybe that there was greatness to be found in the episode, but is marred by one major inconsequential detail, like a lousy ending? Or they aired so early in the show's run that we've forgotten about how great they were during that first go-around? Or perhaps it aired so recently that it hasn't had the chance to repeat ad nauseum in syndication to enter our unconsciousness?

My theory on when a episode becomes underrated? When I see an episode and think "ehh, it was okay," and then several years down the line, the DVD for the season it aired in comes out, and you realize "Hmm...it's actually pretty good!" It's primarily this reason why this list does NOT contain any episodes made after 2004 (aka, after Season 15). I just don't think that enough time has passed for any episode made within the last six years to become underrated.

Either way, I've scoured the internet, and I haven't found a single list of "Most Underrated Episodes" for this show! That changes now, since I found 13 good ones. By the way, this list is in no specific order.


Simpson Tide (Season 9)


If you love to obsessively parrot all of the hilarious, witty, and humorous-in-the-right-context quotes that this show loves to offer as much as I do, good news! It's an overlooked episode simply for airing past the eight season, and I just feel like this is one of the most quotable episodes in the entire series; it's simply 22 minutes of one great line after another. Some of my favorites:

"Damn you, Rock'em Sock'em Robots! Can't we all just get along?"

"You can't spell 'dishonorable' without 'honorable!"

"Hey everyone: Sparkle, Sparkle!"

"My ear hurts and my neck hurts. I have two owies!"

"The Soviet Union? I thought you guys broke up!"
"Yes, that's what we WANTED you to think! Hahahaha!"

"Simpson, you're like the son you never had."
"And you're like the father I never visit."

"That is SO 1991."~Ralph, after Bart tries to sing "Do The Bartman"

"My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist. But he is NOT a porn star!"

And so on. The entire transcript of the episode can be found here. Who could imagine that such a great episode could come out of a plot where Homer (and later Apu, Barney, and Moe) join the Naval Reserves and later pilot a nuclear sub? It's pure Homer in which he has absolutely no interest in the military...until he watches a recruiting ad for the Naval Reserves that boasted serving only one weekend a month and partying for the rest of the time. I also love that Homer's response to any major gaffe in the episode was "It's my first day," and his ability to speak it in four languages (including Penguin!). It's a testament to the character himself that the episode serves as another example of him "failing upwards," where he just acts like his lovable, oafish self and keeps getting promoted. And when he finally gets caught at the end? He gets off the hook as each Admiral that was on the board to court-martial him were themselves being indicted for various scandals: the topical-at-the-time Tailhook Scandal, accepting bribes. torpedoing a Carnival Cruise ship, and, my favorite, impersonating Hillary Clinton.

There's just something great about the traditional song to play whenever an American ship leaves harbor is "In The Navy," complete with over-the-top dance sequence! Hell, even Smithers joins in the act. The rest of the involved characters are a hoot, too. Apu joins the gang regardless of it being discouraged in Hinduism, Barney's response to a drill instructor telling him that his mom won't be around to help him is to point out that she was working on the base not ten feet away from where he was staying, and Moe's thoughts of his "loved one" was a cat that he secretly loved to cuddle.

I also loved Bart visiting a mall where every store is, or is in the process of becoming, a Starbucks in a sharp piece of satire that I'm completely surprised that is still relevant, Barney recognizing water as a "clear, non-alcoholic liquid", and the hilarious way that the episode does away with Captain Tenille by accidentally shooting him out of a torpedo tube at an enemy sub. Finally, there's an honest to God example of a "Big Lipped Alligator Moment" in a sequence where Russia reverts back into the Soviet Union, which culminates in Lenin rising from the grave, growling "Must! Crush! Capitalism!"

In Marge We Trust (Season 8)


Ahh, the episode that's more commonly known as "The Episode with Mr. Sparkle." What puts this episode on the list, then? Well, for one thing, the classic Mr. Sparkle commercial only takes up two minutes of screen-time, with the rest of the episode revolves around Marge and Reverend Lovejoy over their respective crises of faith.

Marge is concerned with her faith because the rest of the family treats Church as a one-hour chore ("If God wanted to devote an hour a week to him, he'd make the week an hour longer!" quips Homer), while Reverend Lovejoy has gradually become disillusioned with love thanks to a 20 year long pestering by Flanders, proving once and for all that Homer isn't the only person in Springfield who hates his guts. This quickly changes as Marge actually takes the time to care about people and help them as the "Listen Lady," while Lovejoy gets envious of her until he actually saves after Flanders gets chased into a Baboon exhibit at the zoo thanks to Marge advising him to shoo away some bullies. If anything, the perfect capper to the A-Story is Lovejoy's rather animated sermon of his battle with the Baboons.

But let's not leave out the fantastic Mr. Sparkle B-Story out of this, either. After a Sunday afternoon of landfill rummaging, Homer, Bart & Lisa come across a box of dish soap written entirely in Japanese with Homer's face on it. It turns out, through the now infamously hilarious commercial, that "Mr. Sparkle" was merely the result of a conglomeration of Matsumura Fishworks (a Fish Mascot) and Tamaribuchi Heavy Manufacturing Concern (A Light Bulb mascot). Thus, the term "Fishbulb" was born.

A special shout-out needs to be given to the voicework in the episode as well. Not only do we get the usual great performances out of the regular family, but especially Julie Kavner as Marge, but also Harry Shearer as both Ned Flanders and Rev. Lovejoy, as well as Gedde Wantanabe (Long Duck Dong from "Sixteen Candles") as the Mr. Sparkle Employee that speaks Engrish at Homer and the fat businessman at the beginning of the Mr. Sparkle video, and Sab Shimono (who you usually hear in many cartoons as Asian Males) as Mr. Sparkle himself.



Treehouse of Horror XI (Season 12)


If I had to choose one Treehouse of Horror episode for the list, it would have to be the 11th outing way back in Season 12. What truly makes this one overlooked is that it was one of those episodes that seemed "meh" or "crap" back when it aired, but I'll admit...it grew on me.

You can thank the final segment, "Night of The Dolphin" for that sentiment. At first, it seems (and was) the zaniest THoH story yet: Lisa resents a dolphin being cooped up in an aquarium and decides to set it free. Said dolphin, Snorky, turns out to be the leader of the dolphins and soon hatches his plan to take the land back from the humans. I was one of those people who thought "what the hell did I just see? Did the Simpsons actually do that?" and brushed it off as another clunker. It was years later when I realized this was pretty inspired. They set the story up as one of those "heavy-handed anti-animal cruelty" stories for Lisa...and then have it utterly backfire on her in the worst way imaginable. You just gotta love the dolphin's first victim being Lenny, who dies in a similar manner to the naked girl in the opening scene of "Jaws" after tempting fate with the winning combination of "alcohol AND night swimming" as the dolphins actually stand up on their flippers to go march towards the town.

And the deaths get progressively violent from there, with Grampa being eaten whole like a snake, the Squeaky-Voiced Teen's head causally falling into Homer's lap when he gets his Krusty Burger, and Kent Brockman being beaten to death off screen by a beach ball. Then there's the great climax of Snorky invading a town meeting to explain his master plan with the voice of Harry Shearer. Just when you think that's it for the humans, Homer rallies the citizens of Springfield with a list of mankind's greatest inventions: computers, leg warmers, bendy straws, peel-and-eat shrimp (my favorite one!), the glory hole AND the pudding cup. I just love that whole list because the pudding cup and peel-and-eat-shrimp would definitely be on Homer's list of best inventions ever.

...Then they encounter every dolphin imaginable overlooking the town a la The Birds and the humans are forcibly pushed into the ocean. If there's one great thing about the DVDs, it's that there was a LOT of fight scenes that were cut out, like Hibbert taking down a few porpoises with syringes and one dolphin being fed gasoline and exploding to reveal an unharmed Grampa.

It was just a funky over-the-top coda to an episode that escalated in weirdess. The first segment, "G-G-Ghost D-D-Dad" has Homer dying by choking on Broccoli (twice!) and must perform one good deed for St. Peter to let him into Heaven. Of course, Homer being Homer, he fails spectacularly when his ONE good deed after several evil ones (like accidentally dropping Agnes Skinner to her death and covering his ass by saying she would've become the next Hitler) gets unnoticed and he's sent to hell. Then the next segment, "Scary Tales Can Come True," is one of those "let's notice just how creepy old Grimm Fairy Tales are" stories when Homer casts Bart & Lisa to forage for themselves after being fired from his job of being an oaf. We get to see trolls, the three bears mauling Goldilocks to death, and an actual witch in a Gingerbread House.

Now, I know from experience that truly classic Simpsons moments are ones that are permanently burned into your head the moment you see it. In this case, it wasn't Homer's ghost choking on the same stalk of Broccoli killing him. It wasn't Bart and Lisa finding the skeletal remains of their older counterparts, nor was it the ending to "Night of The Dolphin," with various floating corpses spelling out "The End?"

No. It was where we see a rather graphic image of Homer laying an egg. If seeing Homer do the deed was bad enough, they actually have Homer grunting, implying that it was painful. And then the image freezes right there to become a woodcut drawing. Yeah, that'll replace the whale in my nightmares.

The Old Man and The Key (Season 13)



Despite what anyone else says, I love Abe "Grampa" Simpson, and consider him a definitely underrated character. There are people out there that complain about the rather slow pace that episodes centering around him travel at due to Abe being much funnier in smaller doses to tell some kind of rambling story. But I like that change. It's fairly uncommon to see anything involving old people at all in media, and things like "The Simpsons" and "Up" tend to show that interesting stories can be had from the elderly. Now, ol' Abe has been a cornerstone of some great episodes ("Old Money," "The Front," "Lisa vs Malibu Stacy," "Mother Simpson," "Lady Bouvier's Lover," "Curse of The Flying Hellfish"), and some ones that weren't so great (I'll get to one particular one in a later entry), but this episode in particular has that great "under-appreciated" feel to it.

It's, of course, another story where Grampa falls in love, this time to a woman named Zelda who has quite an affinity for seniors who can still drive. Of course, Grampa is one of those seniors who can only drive into things, like into an Orca tank at the aquarium. But since the DMV is headed by Marge's sisters, who can't stand the sight of Abe, he gets his license renewed, wins over Zelda and proceed to go on a roadtrip to Branson, Missouri (Or as Bart put it, "Las Vegas run by Ned Flanders") to see a stage show starring 80's has-beens like Charo, Mr. T, Charlie Callas, Adrien Zmed, Bonnie Franklin, Yakov Smirnof and Ray Jay Johnson (voicing himself, I might add). The song itself, I might add, is also what I consider underrated. You have all these washed up stars, who have all gathered to perform a stage show stating about how washed up they are. In Branson, Missouri. Which they describe as being "Nick @ Nite, and made it a town." Along with a catchy melody, it just adds up to pure brilliance.

There's just so many other great moments in this episode, like Abe's drag race with the old man wearing a jacket plastered with logos, who would rather be burned alive than not have people know what stores he's been to; Homer being told by Marge that the XFL went under (who herself was told by the XFL's MVP, who was a hair sweeper at her Beauty Parlor); Bart & Homer's game of Scrabbleship; and my favorite moment of the episode: the Family's detour to Bronson, Missouri, where everyone looks and talks like Charles Bronson.

"Hey ma, how about a cookie?"
"No dice."
"This ain't over."

The President Wore Pearls (Season 15)


Now the show has done some musical episodes before ("SimpsoncalifragailisticexpialiD'ohcious," which parodied Mary Poppins, "All Singing, All Dancing," a musical Clip Show) and after this one ("My Fair Laddy," obviously My Fair Lady), but I feel that this parody of "Evita" does not get the credit it deserves.

At this point in the series, the episode trod upon the story of a grade-school election, but the twist here being that it was Serious Business on the level of a musical starring Madonna that was based on the life of Eva Peron. You'd think a grade-school class president would have no power, yet Principal Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers simply use her classy, nerdish image to soften the blow to put their budget-cutting schemes into power by bribing her with Madonna outfits and popularity. Of course, Lisa catches on and resigns from her post to lead a student-wide strike that is later joined by the police, unions of goat milkers, cue card holders and theme-park zombies, and special guest star Michael Moore. Just when things look grim for Lisa as she's forcibly transferred for a school of the gifted, she sings an excellent parody of "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina" and is later saved by Homer...who refuses to get up early to drive her 45 minutes each morning.

The best part? It all started with a failed Casino night where attendees once again break out into an angry mob once they realize their winnings won't be redeemed for money. Then there's Nelson's attempt to show up Lisa's inspiring campaign song with this: "I am Iron Man DO DO DO DO DO DO DO vote for me!"

Trilogy of Error (Season 12)


This episode just amazes me simply with its story structure. It's a tale of a single day, but told in the perspectives of Homer, Lisa, and Bart, respectively. The story as a whole is this: Lisa has built Linguo, a robot that corrects people's grammar (except its own) for the school's science fair. After a kitchen mishap that gets Homer's thumb chopped off, Marge races him to the hospital...only for Lisa to miss her bus and thus, have no ride in which to get to class. Lisa, in a parody of "Run, Lola, Run" finds Krusty and Mr. Teeny who give her a ride...to WEST Springfield Elementary, putting her off schedule. After several detours, like spouting how much the Blue Man Group ripped off the Smurfs and getting rides from other people as Marge had disappeared when Homer took his time at Moe's, Homer is nowhere near a hospital and discovers Linguo had exploded in town.

This, in turn, leads to Bart's side of the story: Milhouse leads Bart to a cave filled with Fireworks, which had been smuggled by Fat Tony's Mob. A final confrontation occurs in an alleyway between Linguo and the mob, (Marge and Lisa run into Bart, who in turn run into the mobsters chasing him and Milhouse), where an overload of horrible grammar causes Linguo to spark and set off the fireworks that caused him to explode. Obviously, I'm not going to spoil the ending, but I will admit, it was a pretty neat bow that wrapped the whole package together.

Whew. Because the story is essentially one story told three times, we get to see some great scenes from different angles. Case in point: Each segment begins with Flanders' mailbox being ripped out of the ground by the garbage truck; For the first two segments, Bart leaves the house via Milhouse probably having something important to say, which we see in the third segment; We wonder where all the characters go with their cars, and the details are filled in with each segment (Homer hitchhikes, Marge steals Ranier Wolfcastle's car). Finally, with such an intricate story, continuity errors are nonexistent. If one segment had to be snipped for time, than so did every callback to it. All in all, at tail end of what is considered one of the worst seasons of the show...so far, we get a great, solid story this side of 123 Fake Street. Right, Mr. Teeny?

"This story doesn't make sense! Tell the people!"

...Shut up, Mr. Teeny.

New Kids on The Blecch (Season 12)


First and foremost, this episode contained stunt-casting at its absolute finest: N*Sync appearing at the height of the Boy Band craze. Back then, the consensus was "What the hell, Simpsons?" One would think that the show had lowered itself into producing a story so topical that no one would find it funny in ten years time.

Well, ten years have passed, and I beg to differ. As enough time has passed by that fad, we entered that "Why the HELL did we like that?" phase of looking back on childhood music tastes. In my case, my adolescent years were dominated by Boy Bands and pop stars which I can no longer stand to listen to, let alone admit I liked. The episode serves as an excellent time capsule to the late 90's and we can finally see the episode for what it is: An incredibly biting satire on corporate boy band music.

Bart, Milhouse, Nelson, and Ralph are recruited by producer LT Smash to become The Party Posse and become overnight singing sensations thanks to the magic of auto-tuning. While their first music video "Drop Da Bomb" was pretty catchy, we find out the truth: The entire band, along with the music videos, was just a front to subliminally recruit people into the Navy. LT Smash is also revealed to be Lt. LT Smash, who apparently put the whole plan together due to hallucinations about hippies killing soldiers with flowers and mellow vibes. N*Sync basically shows up to offer wisdom of being popstars and showing off unecessary dance moves. The beauty about them is that their own role in the episode is an over-the-top portrayal of themselves. The writers pretty much wrote random things for them to say, like having Joey Fatone saying "old school" as a catchphrase, and enlisting JC in the Navy at the end of the episode. After seeing Joey Fatone make fun of himself on Robot Chicken and Justin Timberlake sticking his dick in a box on SNL, it became pretty clear that these guys had an awesome sense of humor.

There are so many great moments in this episode, beginning with the opening story of Bart cheating to win the Springfield Marathon by posing as a Stereotypical Italian. There's some great entrants in that race as well, like Comic Book Guy dressing up as The Flash, Mr. Burns being carted by Smithers, and what looks to be like Abe running the race turns out to be a dehydrated Homer. Later in the story we have Homer thinking that "Yvan Eth Nioj" is a nonsense phrase like "Shamma Lama Ding Dong" and "Give Peace a Chance," the difference between Subliminal, Liminal, and Superliminal ("Hey you, Join the Navy!" "...Okay."), Ralph saying "I'm a pop sensation!," and LT Smash's biggest fear that would bring down the Party Posse: a spoofing in Mad Magazine. This, of course, leads LT to hijack the airship carrier that the PP was performing a concert on to travel to Manhattan to destroy MAD Headquarters: The Chrysler Building with Alfred E. Neuman's head on the top. He, of course, succeeds in a manner that completely freaked out Post-9/11 America when said event occurred seven months after it aired.

Then there's this final dialogue from N*Sync:

Justin: You know, we've had a lot of fun tonight, at the expense
of the U. S. Navy.
Lance: But they're out there every day protecting us from
Godzilla.
Chris: And don't forget pirates!
JC: And jellyfish.
Joey: Those whack invertebrates will sting you, old-school!
Justin: So check out the Navy for a two, or four-year hitch.
Lance: We signed JC up yesterday.
JC: What? (shore policemen drag away JC) Noooo!

A Star is Burns (Season 6)


I might be admitting a bias on this entry because it's my favorite episode of the entire series. I'll get into more specifics as to why this is in a later entry.

I'll admit, I'm a big sucker for cross-overs, especially in this episode where the show intersects with The Critic, which had moved to Fox from ABC around the same time. The Critic just happens to be one of my favorite animated shows of all time (it was #2 on my list at the time of its airing), and I feel it was one of those great shows that was just left us too soon (only 23 episodes!). On the whole, it was a show where Film Critic Jay Sherman, voiced by John Lovitz, reviews horrible movies while dealing with his soul-crushing life. In short, this episode was basically a half-hour advertisement for the show, which happened to be created by former-at-the-time Simpsons showrunners Al Jean & Mike Reiss (they've since returned to the show).

It's because of the whole "1/2 hour ad" thing that caused fans to decry the episode, and caused Matt Groening to remove his name from the episode, the only time in the entire history of the show where this happened. At the time, I may have agreed with the sentiment, but now...I simply love everything about it. I love Jon Lovitz, I love the Critic, and I love how Marge suggests that the town hold a Film Festival to improve tourism...and works.

Plus, it's the episode where we learn that the most handsome film critic on TV is Leonard Maltin, Chief Wiggum finally found an excuse to wear makeup, that a man getting hit in the groin with a football is funny on so many levels (my personal favorite is the Oscar-winning version with George C. Scott), and finally, the only Pulitzer Prize winners who have over-the-top belching powers are Jay Sherman and Eudora Welty.

Homie The Clown (Season 6)


In my mind, a John Swartzwelder classic that simply got lost within the mix of the rest of the excellent episodes that made up the sixth season. Now, Swartzwelder was the most prolific of the Simpsons writers, with 58 other episodes under his belt besides this one. A few specific trademarks of his are the following: Old-Timey references like Hobos, Irish Cops and dialogue that sounds like it came out of a 1940s gangster movie; really obscure references like "Wagon Train"; getting away with really random background gags by inserting the phrase "for some reason" into the scripts; and his personal style to writing Homer is to imagine him as a talking dog. It's really no surprise that episodes that he pens are very quotable.


A few of my favorites:

"I'm seeing double here! Four Krusties!"

"Stop! Stop! He's already dead!"

"My dad's a pretty big wheel down at the cracker factory!"

"Who am I clowning? I have no business being a clown! I'm leaving the clowning business to all the other clowns in the clowning business!"

Krusty: "Yeah?...Lawsuit?  Oh, come on. My Seven Words You Can't Say on TV" bit was entirely different from your Seven Words You Can't Say on TV bit...So I'm a thief, am I? Well, excuuuse me!  (to his accountant) Give him ten grand."
Woman: "Steve Martin on four."
Krusty: "Ten grand."

Krusty: "All right, now there can only be one Krusty in each territory, so I hope this works out. Tell me where you're from."
Man 1: "Georgia."
Texan 1: "Texas."
Texan 2: "Uh, Brooklyn."
Man 2: "Russia."
Man 3: "New Hampshire."
Homer: "Homer."

Also, you'd be surprised how often "Clown College? You can't eat that!" pops up in my conversations.

Thanks to him, I'd like to say that this episode contains one of my most favorite First Acts in the entire series. It's just a great beginning to a crazy story: Homer stops for every new billboard he sees while causing massive pileups behind him, and proceeds to buy EVERYTHING from the billboards, except for the one for Krusty's Klown Kollege (which Krusty had to start because he was broke and ran out of things to license). His subsequent obsession with clowns, like dreaming the billboard invading his dream of the dream of another sleeping Homer, imagining co-workers on fire as dancing clowns, and finally snapping when he constructs a circus tent out of mashed potatoes a la "Close Encounters" while imagining his whole family as clowns who, for some reason, were humming the classic "Circus Clown Song" (aka "Enter The Gladiators") that leads to this gem of a dialogue:

Homer: "You people have stood in my way long enough! I'm going to clown college!" (storms out)
Bart: "...I don't think anyone expected him to say that."

All of this just perfectly plays into the "Homer as a Talking Dog" theory.

Then comes the rest of the episode where Homer actually enrolls into the college. We learn funny place names (Walla Walla, Keokuk, Cucamonga, and Seattle), to kill the Wealthy Dowanger, and that baggy clown pants fit perfectly on Homer. After he becomes a full-fledged Krusty, his life stinks (like killing the Krusty Burgular), he finds out that Krusty gets free stuff due to a tuft of hair being the only thing that differentiates Homer from the real Krusty. This is bad news for him, as the Fat Tony's mob has once again gone after Krusty, this time after losing an enormous bet AGAINST the Harlem Globetrotters (hey, he thought the Generals were due!!).

In true Simpsons fashion, this leads to the concept of "Speed Holes" in cars, while Flanders himself gets shot twice. I might be a bad person, but it just seemed hilariously satisfying to not only see Flanders get shot, but to see him survive and get shot again. These, along with the visuals of Krusty riding a tiny bicycle through a loop and eating it and an incredibly self-deprecating appearance by Dick Cavett makes for a great episode.

Bart on The Road (Season 7)


Season seven has quite a few excellent episodes, but sadly, this great one just doesn't get mentioned that often.

It's Spring Break in Springfield and the kids have nothing to do. After Bart takes advantage of being bored at the DMV for "Go to Work With Your Parents Day," he creates a fake ID and rents a car to take Milhouse, Martin, and Nelson for a cross-country joyride ending in Knoxville, Tennessee to see the long-defunct World's Fair (or "Wo d F ir" as the sign reads). To this day, I can't think of Knoxville without my mind going to The Sunsphere (now Wigsphere) and Martin's Talking Al Gore Doll ("You. Are. Hearing. Me. Talk."). Ultimately, the Wigshpere crushes their car, the gang is broke, and no one knows that they're not enjoying the national grammar rodeo in the vast cornfields of Canada.

At the same time at SNPP, Homer and Lisa share some genuinely sweet bonding time that we don't get to see too often. It's there we learn of Lisa's crush on Langdon Alger, what Homer actually does at work, and that purple is a fruit. In the end, it's up to them to get Bart out of the mess he got himself in to by suggesting that he delivers a console to the power plant through a courier service.

Other stuff that's absolutely perfect about this: Bart's idea of what "Cruise Control" is, the gang picking up a hitchhiker, the detour through Branson, Missouri ("Vegas if it were run by Ned Flanders"), the two lies in the title for "Naked Lunch," and the ending where Marge gets progressively crazier phone calls while Homer slowly slinks under the covers.

A Tale of Two Springfields (Season 12)


Another tale from John Swartzwelder that has yet to get the credit it deserves. As the title can attest, Springfield is divided in two based on the area codes 636 (Old Springfield, The Rich Part of town) and 939 (New Springfield, Everyone Else). Of course, a wall is later built to keep the unhappy citizens of New Springfield from crossing over the Old Springfield. If Berlin had taught them anything, walls just do not work, even if the townspeople are bribed with daily Who concerts on top of said wall.

Like many Swartzwelder episodes, there's just so many great, zany moments in this episode: Homer never remembering to dial the right area code to the point where he's convinced that hearing the "wrong number" dial tone means that the phone is ringing, the propaganda film starring Phony McRing-Ring that people actually ask questions to, Homer assuming a badger in the doghouse is "probably just Milhouse," the concept of "Area Code Camp," and Kent Brockman getting away with "golden showers" on network television. Speaking of Kent Brockman, there's a great testament to the logic of Swartzwelder where the defining characteristic of people from New Springfield is their usage of "Oh yeah" and "come here a minute."

The Principal & The Pauper (Season 9)


I admit it: I love this episode. But at the time when it aired, I hated it just like everyone else due to the whole "massive retcon of Principal Skinner's life" plot. For those of you in the dark or were trying to forget this episode: It turns out that the Principal Skinner that we all know in love is just an impostor, who was just a street punk named Armin Tamzarian before joining the military and accidentally convincing Agnes Skinner that he was her son. The REAL Seymour Skinner was Armin's Sargent in Vietnam who was supposedly killed, but turns out to have been a POW the entire time. Once the real Skinner comes back in the picture, no one likes him and decides to get rid of him, never to be heard again.

While I now appreciate the gamble that the writers took with the episode, I still don't like the resolution of having the reset button forcibly pressed. Usually when a plot like this comes about, the reset occurs in that ambiguous space of time between the end of this episode and the beginning of the next one. Not this one. Judge Snyder orders everyone to never speak of this again under penalty of torture. If that one line had been omitted, I would've thought that the episode was fantastic. With it intact...it's just a story that will probably never get full kudos for quite a while.

There ARE some great moments to be had, though. The Skinner-Formerly-Known-as-Armin saying "Up yours, children!"; Ralph wanting to become either "a principal or a caterpillar" when he grows up; Homer wanting to read "Armin's copy of Swank"; Marge not wanting to receive crapweeds for Valentine's Day; Homer's reaction to the impostor revelation being his brain telling him to "keep looking shocked and move slowly towards the cake" (one of my favorite Homer lines of all time); and this great dialogue:

Homer: Okay, once more.  Where are we going?
Edna: To Capital City.
Homer: And why are you and the old lady in the car?
Agnes: We're gonna talk Armin Tanzarian into coming back.
Homer: And why is Marge here?
Marge: I came up with the idea.
Homer: And why am I here?
Marge: Because the streets of Capital City are no place for three unescorted ladies.
Homer: Why are the kids here?
Marge: Because we couldn't find Grandpa to sit for them.
Homer: Why is Grandpa here?
Abe: Because Jasper didn't want to come by himself!
Homer: Huh, fair enough.

There's No Disgrace Like Home (Season 1)


This episode is one that I feel has been lost to the grim specter of time. It was only the FOURTH episode of the series, where admittedly, the specific traits for each character had yet to be nailed down, and later exaggerated for comic effect. It's this episode out of any other that every main Simpson aside from Bart acts nothing like the people that they would eventually become. Case in point:

Lisa: Actually acts like an eight year-old girl without any of the "granola girl in training" bookworm qualities that she would get in later episodes.

Marge: Actually drinks in this episode, to the point where she's leading other people at Mr. Burns' picnic in a rather elaborate drinking song.

But the most interesting case is Homer: He's actually concerned about the well-being of his family. First of all, he's incredibly concerned about looking good in front of Mr. Burns for the company picnic (he was, after all, promoted to his now-familiar position of Safety Inspector in the previous episode), and after watching the antics of his family compared to people like the Flanders and another peaceful family that rides their car up to Heaven, it's time for therapy.

Therapy via Dr. Marvin Monroe is one thing, but how he pays for the session is unthinkable nowadays: HE PAWNS THE TV! I really had to emphasize that one. It's the most beloved of all of Homer's possessions, and he simply pawns it for the good of the family. Hell, even Marge was begging Homer not to do it! But this all leads to one of the first truly Classic moments in the show: The Electroshock Scene.


This is simply a groundbreaking moment in not only cartoons, but in TV itself. In 1990, it was the first time that we not only see a cartoon family in therapy, but that a show in prime time actually had a family, animated or otherwise, willfully participate in electro-shocking the rest of their family. Homer shocks for fun, Bart would obviously shock her sister, Lisa would shock back, Marge would shock her own children for shocking each other, and Maggie just likes pushing the buttons.

When not even this gets the family to be "normal," Homer gets double the money he paid back, as per Dr. Monroe's guarantee, he doesn't use the money to get the TV back. No, he uses the money to get a better TV, the one that would stay on the show until it finally crapped out in Season 7. I just find all of this incredibly interesting as I'm looking back at this episode. It's truly a classic episode in the rocky first season whose greatness had unfortunately been surpassed by more superior episodes down the line.

Do you agree with this list? Are there any do you think I missed? Which episodes do YOU think are criminally underrated?

Friday, February 5, 2010

DVD Review: Simpsons Season 20

I guess I should finally get off my ass and actually contribute something for Simpsons Month. I'll start off this special month of entries with a review of the most current DVD Release: Season 20!


Ta-da! Here it is in its full DVD glory, I guess. I kept wondering why Fox decided to release Season 20 now, while skipping seasons 13-19 in the process, but I believe I have the answer: Blu-Ray. Yes, Season 20 was the first season to be animated in High Definition, so a transition to Blu-Ray would be relatively simple compared to adapting the previous 19 seasons in this format. I guess with the "Hi-def Wars" finally won, it seemed like Fox wanted to release Hi-Def Season 20 as soon as possible because if we don't support this thing, it might not make it!

The first thing you notice about this set is obviously the packaging. Compared to the packing of even the first five seasons, Season 20 seems to be as generic as possible. It's the same "20th Anniversery" art that's been showing up everywhere! It's like they didn't want to pay the burnt-out animators one penny more to take some time out to draw a simple DVD cover.


On the plus side, the inside cover finally gives us an update to the "Let's Cram as Many Simpsons Characters as We Can into This Picture!" Here is that shot again, but with closeups of each section:


Instead of leaving off at Season 9 like the old poster did, we have a sheet that's updated for the 20th season! From the most recent season, I can clearly identify Maya, Simon Woosterfield, Alaska Nebraska, Jenny, and Bestimus Mucho (the Bumblebee Parody from Treehouse of Horror XXIX's "Untitled Robot Parody"). It does tell something about this season when I had to research the names of the latter two characters, yet I can pick out much more obscure characters like all 7 Duffs (Edgy, Tipsy, Sleazy, Queasy, Dizzy, Surly and Remorseful), all 8 of Apu's Children (Uma, Priya, Sashi, Poonam, Anoop, Gheet, Sandeep & Nabendu), Duff McShark, Lugash, Sideshow Raheem, The Inanimate Carbon Rod, Chad Sexington, The Screamapiller, and quite a few more that you probably don't care about.


Allright, it's on to the DVD itself. As you can see, the menus pretty much confirmed that Fox just said "fuck it, let's rush it" to this set. The animation is nothing more than Matt Groening sketching out characters, which is sketched out verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyy ssssssllllooooowwwwwwllllyyyy. This rush job attitude extends to the special features.

Which is to say, there's none. None. At. All. Now, I'm a guy who firmly believes that the Commentary makes or breaks a DVD set for me, and when I discovered that there was a total lack of a mention on it on the DVD Cover, I started to panic. It's a Simpsons DVD set, they go all out, right? Commentaries, Deleted Scenes, random featurettes, commentaries FOR the deleted scenes, the works. Turns out, there's not even an introductory video from Matt Groening that opened up every DVD set since Season 6. I checked Amazon to find to my horror that, in terms of extras: nope, nothin' at all!

Nothin' at all!

Nothin' at all!

...Stupid, Sexy Flanders. Anyway, there's an enormous amount of stuff that they could make DVD extras for! Stuff on the guest stars, various Simpsons Swag, Maggie finally talking, her first words to the family in "Coming To Homerica," and a full-on diatribe voiced by Jodie Foster in "Four Great Women & A Manicure," a thing about the crossword that appears at the end of "Homer & Lisa Exchange Cross Words" being the ACTUAL NY Times Crossword for the day that the episode aired, the fact that THIS WAS THE 20TH SEASON OF A TV SHOW. Anything!

Okay, there IS something on this set. On Disc 4, there's a sneak peek of the 20th Anniversary Special. There were two problems with this:

1) Said special could not be included on the DVD, as it aired TWO DAYS PRIOR TO THIS DVD HITTING THE SHELVES.
2) It's the exact. same. clip that's found on Hulu. You can see it here.

So if you just happen to have all 21 episodes on your DVR, congratulations, you just saved $30! Even without all of the non-commentary extras, I still feel like this bare-bones set is a complete slap in the face to anyone who consider themselves as "Simpsons Fans."

But I'll be completely honest with you: If you just plain want to see the episodes and don't really care about the extras, by all means, pick up the set. Because this was a GOOD season. Sure, it's not at the unreachable levels of awesome that seasons 4-7 had, but Season 20 was one of the most consistently good seasons this show has had in a while.

The best episodes in this season, in my opinion: "Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words," "Lisa The Drama Queen," "In The Name of The Grandfather," "THoH XXIX," "Take My Life, Please," and "Gone Maggie Gone," which was probably one of the best episodes in quite a while.

The show's been on for 20 years, there's a few duds, too. Namely "Wedding For Disaster," where Marge becomes a Bridezilla when organizing her third wedding (turns out Rev. Lovejoy wasn't licensed when he remarried Homer & Marge back in "A Milhouse Divided"), and "Father Knows Worst," where Marge becomes obsessed with the house's secret sauna while Homer becomes a Helicopter Parent (God, I hate those. Perhaps its the fact that they played the actual mannerisms completely dead-on, and just didn't seem right with Homer. He was finally using Whole-Assed Over-parenting, and I'll agree with Bart & Lisa, in which I prefer Homer's half-assed under-parenting any day of the week).

Then there's the Fountainhead segment from "Four Great Women and a Manicure," which, as I said earlier, is where Maggie talks with Jodie Foster's voice. Much like Bart admitting he was El Barto, Maude Flanders getting killed off or Moe getting a cell phone, it was one of those things that JUST. SHOULDN'T. HAPPEN. Whenever I watched that scene, I kept imagining Maggie from THoH V saying "This is indeed a disturbing universe" in James Earl Jones' voice, just ripe from murdering Groundskeeper Willie with an axe.

But, to be completely honest, even those episodes aren't BAD (I'll get to those episodes later). They just pale in comparison to the awesomeness of the episodes that surround them.

To close, if you're like me and just want the episode because your DVR kept cutting off the first few minutes of episodes and/or missing good chunks of them because of work and not discovering Hulu until it's too late, or if you just plain don't mind a bare-bones Simpsons set, I recommend picking it up. Everyone else, especially if you absolutely love the extra bang for the buck as well as the absolute care that went into the previous 12 season sets, SKIP IT. This was one of the few DVDs where I suffered buyer's remorse, but the quality of the episodes alleviated it somewhat.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Februrary is Simpsons Month!

Hey, hey, it's February! What does this all mean? Fine, I'll tell you: The 28th will be the blog's second birthday, so I've decided to declare this month

SIMPSONS MONTH!

If you're no stranger to this blog, you'll know that I absolutely adore the Simpsons, and it's about time that it gets its formal due on this thing. It's currently in it's 21st season, and I'm happy to tell you all that I'm one of those rare folk that has seen every episode (452 as of 2/1/10) and DOESN'T bitch that it hasn't been good in X amount of years!

So, in the coming days, expect entries on the following:

-The most underrated episodes
-My favorite episodes
-My least favorite episodes
-My favorite characters
-A review of the 20th Season DVD
-A review of Simpsons Scene It!
-A review of The Simpsons Game (Wii)


And possibly more! Since February is also when the 2010 Winter Olympics are being held down there in Vancouver, expect an entry on that.

Until next time, to tide you all over, here's a video of Moby's Hip-Hop Remix of the "Mr. Plow" song.

Friday, January 22, 2010

My 15 Favorite Conan O'Brien Characters

Tonight is the last episode of Conan O'Brien's terribly short reign at the "Tonight Show." If there was one amazing hallmark to Conan himself, it was that his supporting cast, at both Late Night and Tonight, was littered by dozens of completely off-the-wall characters. These were mostly named after what they did (Masturbating Bear, Robot on The Toilet, The Coked-Up Werewolf, etc) and that basically served as their primary function. They would appear, we would laugh, Conan would be amazed about how lame they were and then the character would get sad and leave. Then we laughed again.

There were several hundred characters introduced during the 16 year run of Late Night, and the 7 month run of the Tonight Show, mostly being seen for one time only. But a certain handful of characters, liked them or not, caught on and kept coming back. Here now are fifteen of my absolute favorites. This was originally a ten item list...but then I thought of five more.

#15: The Bugatti Veyron Mouse



The most recent addition in Conan's roster of characters, it's the most expensive car in the world, dressed up as a mouse, with an original master recording of the Rolling Stone's "Satisfaction" serving as its theme song. It was just there to say "Screw you" to NBC by pretty much replacing him with Leno. It's price tag? A speculated worth of $1.5 million. "Speculated" was typed due to the car not being bought, but lent from a museum. The song itself WAS a massive bitch to clear the rights for, money-wise, which explains why you'll never see it again outside of this picture and Youtube.

#14: Quackers



It was a bit that was simple enough: A dumb, random sketch involved a duck walking on screen when someone told Conan to "Duck." People loved the duck so much, he was brought back on the next night, when something incredibly horrifying happened: The duck crapped onscreen, and then after a pause BEGAN TO EAT IT. Horrifying Conan and the rest of the audience, "Quakers, The Shit-Eating Duck" became a running joke among the fandom as a testament to the greatness that is unscripted television. I loved that so much.

#13: The FedEx Pope



I loved him, but in an ironic tone. But then again, so did everyone else, as even Conan admitted that he was too lame to be killed off. My favorite moments from him? Being spared from being killed off via a wood chipper that already claimed the lives of "Shoeverine" and "Mansy the Man-Pansy," and the time where he once took a nap that was a satirical jab to the late Pope John Paul II's wake. (pictured above)

I think he was finally retired when Conan ended "Late Night," but I don't even think he had the urge to retire him with all of the others when it was their turn. Every time I look at that picture, I wonder just who the hell thought him up?

#12: Preparation H Raymond



I don't know why he was funny nor why he should be (he had big, hairy ears and gave out free tubes of Preparation H), but I loved him none the less. Perhaps it was his infectious theme song which explained the symptoms that his products relieved in the most garish of detail.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh/If you got a rectal itch/Ramond's here!/Raymond's here!/If you got a butt that ya need to scratch/Ramond's here to help!"

#11: Little Jay Leno



[sadly, no pic of him exists on the internet :( ]

He was just some midget actor that looked a hell of a lot like the real Jay Leno, except 1/8th his size. For some reason, I found him hysterical, and I wished that HE was hosting the Tonight Show over the real one.

#10. Frankenstein



One of the properties that the show could use for free was Frankenstein. He was the star of a segment called "Frankenstein Wastes a Minute of Our Time," where Frankenstein would leave the Late Night set to seek out some lame object in a far corner of the backstage of the studio. One of my favorite segments was when during one of his travels, he passes by Tom Hanks and pays more attention to showing off the light switch that was behind him.

#9. Abe Vigoda




Everyone's favorite Not-Dead Actor, Conan loved trotting out Abe at every opportunity that he could. Sadly, he couldn't join Conan in LA, as he was set free into the wild during Late Night's final episode.

#8. La Bamba




The band's resident trombone player was the resident butt-monkey of the show, mostly for his utter lack of acting skills. Why was he riffed on so much? I don't really give a damn, but I hope he, his mustache, and his Popemobile follows Conan wherever he goes.

#7. Pierre Bernard



One of Late Night Comedy's greatest Nerds, he was shot into the spotlight when he created the "Recliner of Rage" segment over his detest that [adult swim] had replaced "Cowboy Bebop" with "Case Closed" in the 1am Weeknight Slot at the time. He loved Bebop's opening theme so much that listening to it at that hour was the only way he was able to fall asleep. Thankfully, he moved to LA with Conan to nerd out on that side of the country, but the recliner stayed in New York.

#6: The Walker Texas Ranger Lever



When NBC merged with Universal, Conan realized something brilliant: He can show awesome, out-of-context clips of "Walker, Texas Ranger" whenever he wanted for absolutely no charge! You can thank the whole "Chuck Norris Facts" craze on this thing.

Like all good late night bits, it was repeated ad-nauseum for the span of roughly a month when everyone grew tired of it. It took a break for a few years until it was brought back for Late Night's final week, where it played everyone's favorite clip: Haley Joel Osmont telling some people "Walker told me I have AIDS."

#5: Robert Smigel's Arnold Scwarzenegger Impression



One segment that I've been very pissed about not joining Conan at the Tonight Show was his "Live Via Satellite" segments, where Conan interviews cutouts of celebrities who would never appear on the show, with their mouths animated Clutch Cargo-style and usually voiced by Robert Smigel (Fun Fact: This is called Syncro-Vox). My favorite one was Robert's over the top impression of Arnold Swarzenegger, who always spouted non sequitor quotes from his movies and pimping "Jingle All The Way" for no reason whatsoever.


#4. The Random, Arbitrary Characters



I loved these guys, as it was a hallmark to the deepest depths of absurdity that Conan and his writers dove to just for create some kind of lame joke. Some of the more well-known ones:

"Gorilla Nurse Using an Old-Timey Abdominal Exerciser to Juice Newton's 'Angel in The Morning"

"Castro Rabbit DJ"

"Tortoise Rabbi Riding a Mechanical Bull"

"The World's Fastest Menorah"

"Cactus Chef playing 'We Didn't Start The Fire' on The Flute" (pictured)

"Fire Hydrant Pimp Riding a Skateboard"

"The Sears Tower Wearing Sears Clothing"

"Raccoon with a Jetpack"

and my favorite: "Scuba Diving Meatloaf Sitting in a Wheelchair," who was always backed up by the band singing "Chatanooga Choo-Choo" whenever the camera cut to it.

#3: Pimpbot 5000



It was an old-timey looking robot, yet acted like a totally badass pimp. What's not to love?! I must confess, this character was retired before I was a regular viewer of "Late Night," but he was awesome in all of the clips I saw him in.

#2: The Masturbating Bear



The utter epitome of crass humor, all he did was jiggle his diaper and everyone would roar with laughter. His inevitable appearance on the Tonight Show was the clearest sign that the show was going to end, as Conan truly had nothing left to lose by letting him do his thing.

#1: Triumph The Insult Comic Dog



Yeah, of course this guy was going to be #1. A puppet that can say and do whatever he damn well pleases, and it's guaranteed comedy gold wherever he goes. My favorite bit? Of course, it's his trip to the premiere of "Attack of The Clones," which pretty much put him AND Conan himself into stardom.


Wherever you go, CoCo, I just want to let you know that I'll be there with you, regardless if any of these other guys are able to join you.

To my readers: Who was YOUR favorite character?

UPDATE:

Honorable Mentions include: The Interrupter, Max Weinberg, Cloppy, The Slipnuts, Oldy Oldstein, Wing, Kayak Guy, The Hunky Newcomer, Cody Devereaux, Wax!Fonzie & Wax!Tom Cruise, Andy's Little Sister, and Joel Goddard & His Asian Male Escort Toshi.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Christmas Fallout '09!

Hey all, it's the first entry of 2010, and you know what that means? That's right, I get to show you what I got for Christmas this year! Er, last year.







Plus the requisite money and such. I got gift cards for Wild Wings in my stocking and a gift certificate to Smokin' Al's, my favorite BBQ place here on Long Island. Best Secret Santa gift? I think so!

I also got a new phone (LG Dare!) and a new pair of sneakers as early gifts, so it kind of explains the low haul this year. Also, I just wasn't in the mood for more stuff than what I got this year. But something I did buy yesterday:


iPod Touch, baby! It set me back a good $300+ after tax thanks to it being a 32Gig, but worth every penny. But the most awesome thing? None of that was Christmas money, and it didn't put a single dent in my wallet. I go to Dave & Buster's every once in a while, and I found that they were selling iPod Nanos for 30,000 tickets. I currently have a little more than 15,000 (I would be at that level if I didn't blow another 15,000 on a now-last-gen Shuffle). My mom told me that I probably have enough money in my wallet to get one myself, so I looked there. And as it turns out, I did. Like I said...awesome. I totally predict becoming one of the iPod douchebags who likes to whip it out at every occaision, especially in 2010 where absolutely no one cares about that anymore!

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Better Know a Christmas: Great Britain

"Christmas" in the traditional sense may have ended at 11:59pm, but there are still 12 more days of Christmas to go, so it's only fitting that I'm devoting more time to these entries. There would've been more this week but "A Very Dennis Christmas Special" took up most of my time aside from work.

The country getting the spotlight this time? Great Britain.


If anything, Britain is probably single-handedly responsible for saving Christmas from becoming as important as Channukah. Back in the 19th Century, Christmas was a mostly Catholic holiday and was in danger of falling out of style until Charles Dickens himself wrote "A Christmas Carol." It's highly likely that people like Scrooge were common back then, and this tale gave them quite the wake up call. Sure, while it's one day off, people began to realize to care about people, their legacy, and, well, money. Yeah, it turns out the only way to truly save a holiday is to commercialize the hell out of it. Over a century later, this has yet to fail.

Traditions, you ask? Plenty. Britain shares plenty of ours, like caroling, putting up the trees and obnoxious light displays, hanging stockings, having too much eggnog, you get the deal.

The significance of Poinsettias originated here. At first I wondered what the hell it had to do with Christmas, but apparently its shape signifies the Star of Bethlehem, with the red representing the blood of Christ. There seems to be a lot of "blood" and other fluid related names for food in Britain, Isn't there? Blood Pudding, Mincemeat pie and Steak & Kidney Pie (which, according to Marge Simpson, is what they call Botulism on that side of the pond).

It's also worthy of note that Christmas cards were invented here, too. In 1840, a man who had forgotten to buy his wife a gift that year decided to scrawl out "MERRY CHRISTMAS! I LOVE YOU!" on a folded-over pub napkin to give to her in its place. It's the thought that counted, and people have been carrying on the tradition ever since.

What do they eat for Christmas Dinner? Well, over there, the big Christmas meal is lunch, to make up for the lost time that there's no Thanksgiving or Thanksgiving-like holiday in November. Besides the usual spread of Turkey, cranberries, Brussels sprouts, roasted potatoes, and various other familiar side dishes of crappy British food, they eat mincemeat pie, fruitcake, and most importantly...Christmas Pudding.


Dun dun duuuuun! I'm exaggerating a bit, I know. It's usually made with plums, or as the song goes, figs. As the picture shows, it, much like the Flaming Homer itself, seems to be improved by the addition of fire. To mask the taste, stuff like dried fruit and nuts are baked with the plums or figs, and is usually covered by cream and a hefty amount of alcohol.

Oh, and don't expect any two sets of families to prepare any of these foods in the same way. That's just the way it is.

Another timeless British Christmas tradition itself is the Christmas Cracker.


It's a paper-covered tube filled with confetti and sorts that explode when two people pull it apart. Tradition states that a small toy and a little slip of paper containing lame jokes must be contained within, and the event must be partaken whilst wearing dumb paper crowns. Everyone hates it, but tradition states that, too.

We sure can't forget about the British Equivalent of Santa, Father Christmas.


There's not much of a difference between him and the American Santa, aside from the name and the clothes. Oh, instead of living at the North Pole, he lives in the more realistic Lapland. It at least answers the annoying questions of kids if where exactly he lives, and people can actually visit it and not fear it melting away due to Al Gore's Global Warming.

Lastly, there are the Christmas Specials. Sure, the UK imports some of ours, but they've got some traditions of their own. First off, it just Isn't Christmas unless Channel 4 airs "The Snowman"


A quaint little Christmas special where a Snowman comes to life, and plays with the protagonist until he disappears. It's such a tradition, it's on the level of "Charlie Brown Christmas" and "Rudolph" if someone screws with it. The one year where the special DIDN'T air, Channel 4 had its lowest Christmas ratings ever, and was beaten out by Channel 5, which is the U.S. equivalent of Fox being beaten out by CW.

Along with that, Dr. Who airs its annual Christmas Episode, the soap operas like East Enders and Coronation Street air their most depressing episodes of the year, and the Queen gives out her yearly Royal Message which airs on most of the terrestrial channels. She basically trots out and gives a message of peace, love, and waving, and then back to her palace for six more weeks of winter. To combat this, Channel 4 airs an Alternative Message at the same time, with a different speaker each year. Last year was "President" Ahmadinejad, and in 2004...it was Marge Simpson, of all people.


...I'm pretty sure that video sums this all up rather nicely.